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Category: comedy, fun, double take

Here’s one I prepared earlier

I wonder if you’re as old as I am, dear reader, but you must have seen Blue Peter at some point if you live in the UK. I’ve been reading, and hearing, a lot about tv programmes and films from my youth recently. The title is a reference to Blue Peter, fairy liquid bottles and sticky-back plastic.

I made an assortment of junk into useful items following on from that particular prog. Recently, however, I’ve been wondering what, if anything, opens up the creative juices for the next generation of MMORPG kids out there? We had lots of things to get the imagination fired up, as well as BP there was Magpie, Animal Magic, then there was the Morph plasticine characters, is it any wonder we took a lot of halucinogenics back then?

I was also encouraged at school to allow free rein to my imagination, essays in English would start with a title and we could develop that in whatever way we wanted. In art we were encouraged to follow our own technique when drawing, painting or creating plaster creatures from moulds. The animals were recognisable but not from the colours I used. I used a lion mould and then painted him with a purple body, green face and orange tail and mane. He looked spectacular and won me a prize for most original artwork.

Now I’m older I find the mind’s not as fertile as it once was and I wonder when I lost the creative streak. If anyone knows the answer please let me know.

I came across this earlier

Listening to an anti drug song earlier by Roy Harper, the irony hadn’t escaped him either. As an introduction he mentioned that “Drugs for Everyone” was an anti-drug song he’d written some time ago, given his past relationships with chemicals and herbs, it was rather a strange thing for him to do.

I was reminded of another anti-drug song by Harry Nilsson called (I think) “The Ivy Colored Walls”, again not someone instantly associated as being anti-drug. A bit like Keef Richards dressed like a pirate and expecting us to believe he can act the part of Johnny Depp’s dad.

If there was ever a song of irony, however, it would have to be Ironic, by Alannis Morrisette. The thing about irony isn’t the fact it makes sense, it’s rather the fact that it seems strange. This is because we’re all strange in some way.

On that note I’ll bid you goodnight and catch you tomorrow.

Three little birds sit on my doorstep

Well, the blog I was going to post yesterday has been changed so often it’s now tomorrow, except its still today as today becomes yesterday.

I wonder if, this time, I can follow my train of thought to a conclusion. I started off when yesterday was today, today was tomorrow and the rain put me off going anywhere. I started off with the weather, then started moaning about all the rain, that draft was then scrapped. I next started talking about the music I’ve been listening to on both iPad and iPhone, then decided you wouldn’t be too interested, dear reader, so that was scrapped. I left it for a few hours while thinking what I could talk about, and fell asleep. Now that I’ve woken up I’m no further forward, but I really do want to try for 365 posts in 2013.

I can relate to people with problems, after all don’t we all have the same issues at some point in our lives? They reckon everyone is affected by mental health problems at some time in their lives, either suffering an illness or breakdown, or witnessing a breakdown as someone in the immediate family suffers. I’ve seen both sides as I’ve been bi-polar all my life and can no longer cover it up, and my mum had a nervous breakdown just after my youngest brother got married and moved out. She then suffered three heart attacks, was advised to take things easy and ignored that advice, took the Hoover upstairs, felt ill, went back down to the living room and was dead when my dad got in from work. I wasn’t even in the country that day as I’d travelled overnight the day before to pick up my daughter and her 3 step brothers so that they could spend summer with me.

I still find myself talking to my mum now, from time to time, and still miss her, I also miss my daughter (she’s not dead, just not talking to me because I made a stupid mistake in 1997). This is where I’ve got to decide whether or not to publish this, or scrap it and start again. Suppose, if I want to blog every day this year I should publish now and start a new blog tomorrow.

Lucky thirteen begins

I hope you enjoyed whatever you were doing to see in the New Year, I couldn’t have any alcohol, hence no hangover, and saw it in alone but I was not lonely, for a change. I had thought the neighbours from hell would mark the arrival with a bang and a huge wheelie bin fire, especially as they’ve been quiet for the past 2 weeks, but they went out by car early on.

I watched the New Year in with Jools Holland (as always) before turning over to watch Fletch, I just love Chevy Chase because he remains deadpan to deliver the one liners which makes them even funnier somehow. After Fletch I turned the box off and the lights on to wish my friends a Happy New Year, at least those I knew would still be up. I don’t have many friends which some might find strange, I go for quality not quantity and always have.

Anyway, I just want to say that I have every intention of putting some content on here more regularly in 2013 than I did in 2012, I hope you enjoy my rants, raves and laughs this year and everyone should enjoy life, living and not have any fears, whatever you do enjoy this year, and remember today is the first day of the rest of your life!

Happy New Year one and all.

First man on the moon?

Hey there reader, watching Neil Armstrong, First man on the moon and its a fascinating insight into the pilot of the Eagle which was the first manned craft to land on another heavenly body. One small step for man was indeed a huge leap for mankind.

I know all the arguments that say it was a hoax because… But, if it was a hoax it couldn’t have been kept a secret this length of time as someone, possibly even Neil himself, would’ve let something slip before today. It’s no longer possible to take secrets to the grave, not like it was 2,000 years ago.

Anyway, I’m not going to get into a big philosophical debate about the moon landings, god or anything else. I’m just going to wish each and every one of my readers, yes I know it’s just you dear reader, a happy and prosperous lucky 2013.


What is going on here?

Well, touch wood, my connection seems to have stabilised so here goes with my first blog in such a long time.

Xmas is over for another year, presents bought, wrapped and then opened again. Everyone loves to see the joy the presents bring to the faces of those we love. For me, and thousands like me, the absolute pleasure on the faces of our grandchildren is such a joy to behold but afterwards, when they go home to have Xmas dinner, leaving us alone, the temptation to say “I’ve changed my mind, if the invitation is still open I’d love to come for dinner” is very strong, but you don’t say it because the food has been bought, shops are closed and you really don’t want to impose.

I’ve helped to do so much this year, changed the minds of giant corporations, with help of course. But there’s more to do next year, I may be alone but I’m never lonely, never bored as I can always find so much to do to help others, even if they don’t know I’m helping them. This is the only planet we have but we seem hell bent on destroying it. I, and my friends in Greenpeace, are trying to change things but we need your help to do more. The more people adopt apathy the harder the struggle becomes.

Ok that’s enough preaching, especially as you, dear reader, already do what you can. For some of us every day is a struggle, especially those like me coping with illness, surgery and heartbreak. I may be on my own but I still see my step kids and their Nana is very ill and has spent the last week in hospital, I’ve called in to see her and she’s not looking too good. I’m prepared for the worst, as much as anyone can, but still hope for the best. My son still calls her Nana and I take him to see her as often as I can but won’t take him to the hospital as I don’t want his last memory to be of a frail old lady who doesn’t know what’s going on around her.

For my regular reader, you will remember I said the world would NOT end on December 21st and we’re still here. I wish you all a very happy 2013, hoping its not a washout like 2012 has been! We’ve had so much rain this year it’s been a wonder this island of ours didn’t sink into the ocean like Atlantis. Anyway, I hope you had a wonderful Xmas and here’s to good times in the next 12 months.

Things that make you go “WTF!”

When goods are sent by ship they’re called cargo, when sent by road it’s a shipment, why?
Why’s it called rush hour, when it usually lasts over 2 hours and nothing moves at more than 2mph?
Why do some people moan about the weather, instead of dressing appropriately for it?
Why do they call it Global Warming when, for most people, it’s generally cold and miserable all year?
Why is English more prone to errors today than it ever was before?
Surely sit up is the same as sit down?
Why do you button up clothing yet you start at the top?
Why does the sun never shine until you’re ill and can’t go out?
Why does warm weather happen wherever you’re not?
When you decide to enjoy a winter sun break why does the country you visit have the coldest winter/summer in living memory?
Why can you stand down at the end of the day if you don’t stand up at the beginning?
Why are there so many stupid people in the world, when there’s no God?
If there was a god (or gods) would he really allow so many wars and millions dying in his name?
Why are terrorists and freedom fighters used to describe the same types of people?
Who is responsible for rumours?