Gone to Hell?
Today I decided that I was going to post once again on here. I’ve spent the last few weeks engrossed with work, as I’m off for the holidays I can’t use that excuse any more. I spent the last few days catching up with friends both on and off here.
Now, I was taught that if you can’t find anything nice to say about someone then you should say nothing at all. Pity there are too many people in the world today who want to shout at others, they are who they think they are! I don’t, and won’t drop into the gutter to give them recognition on here. Suffice to say trolling adds nothing to any conversation and lets the world see them as they really are, nobodies.
I make a point of finding positives now, what a difference a year makes! Last year I was in pieces, therapy was helping although very slowly, then I started talking control of myself once more. The process speeded up when a company said they believed in me and offered me a chance to turn my life around. Needless to say I grabbed this opportunity with both hands and my transformation is now complete (Search in your heart, Luke, I am your father). Since I started working again I have been finding positives everywhere and I feel better for this.
The strange thing about depression is the way you spiral down into the depths without others noticing that you are quiet most of the time and spend more and more time on your own. If you’re in company then you sit on the edge and won’t contribute. When you do pluck up the courage to speak you will make others laugh at your witty comments, just to prevent others from guessing how you really feel.
Why is that? Every time I start feeling better something goes wrong and it all falls apart, this sends me deeper into despair than I was before. There is an intranet site that I found very supportive and that makes me think why? If you look at the negatives around you with fresh eyes then you can often turn this around and find positives there.
I started this post off today to give hope to those being stalked and to look for answers within and without themselves. You are going through Hell at the moment but if you have friends then you’re not alone and you will get by with a little help from your friends.